Eyes Big Big

Look at this Buddha statue…… I totally amuse by the additional cute features put up by the owner.

Eyes Big Big…. not too scary at all… hehehehe

Cute Postcard

ooop !!! No posting for long time again…. wonder when am I going to totally give up on blogging…. errrrr……

This morning Mr C thrown this postcard for me…. he like it and me too.

So cute right ?  Should I hammer my wheel to this shape too ??

Naughty Postcard

Time to put up another funny postcard.

I think this card originally from Europe. A farmer riding a pig…. funny ???

mmmm…. not too special right…. what about I zooooom in closer to the pig itself…..

mmmm…. can see ? Can see ? or it is just a shadow ?

Panasonic Hokkien Ad

OMG… I  LOVE this AD….  Hardly see such a unique ad from BolehLand…. not I would say… PANASONIC BOLEH !

Aunty Amber look a bit out of her element…..

Six Affairs

 

The 1st Affair

A married man was having an affair

with his secretary.

One day they went to her place

and made love all afternoon.

Exhausted, they fell asleep

and woke up at 8 PM.

The man hurriedly dressed

and told his lover to take his shoes

outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.

He put on his shoes and drove home.

'Where have you been?' his wife demanded.

'I can't lie to you,' he replied,

'I'm having an affair with my secretary.

We had sex all afternoon.'

She looked down at his shoes and said:

'You lying bastard!

You've been playing golf!'

 

The 2nd Affair

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters

but always talked about having a son.

They decided to try one last time

for the son they always wanted..

The wife got pregnant

and delivered a healthy baby boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery

to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child

he had ever seen.

He told his wife: 'There's no way I can

be the father of this baby.

Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!

Have you been fooling around behind my back?'

The wife smiled sweetly and replied:

'No, not this time!'

 

The 3rd Affair

A mortician was working late one night.

He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz,

about to be cremated,

and made a startling discovery.

Schwartz had the largest private part

he had ever seen!

'I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz,' the mortician

commented, 'I can't allow you to be cremated

with such an impressive private part.

It must be saved for posterity.'

So, he removed it,

stuffed it into his briefcase,

and took it home.

'I have something to show

you won't believe,' he said to his wife,

opening his briefcase.

'My God!' the wife exclaimed,

'Schwartz is dead!'

 

The 4th Affair

A woman was in bed with her lover

when she heard her husband

opening the front door.

'Hurry,' she said, 'stand in the corner.'

She rubbed baby oil all over him,

then dusted him with talcum powder

'Don't move until I tell you,'

she said. 'Pretend you're a statue.'

'What's this?' the husband inquired

as he entered the room.

'Oh it's a statue,' she replied.

'The Smiths bought one and I liked it

so I got one for us, too.'

No more was said,

not even when they went to bed.

Around 2 AM the husband got up,

went to the kitchen and returned

with a sandwich and a beer.

'Here,' he said to the statue, 'have this.

I stood like that for two days at the Smiths

and nobody offered me a damned thing.'

 

The 5th Affair

A man walked into a cafe,

went to the bar and ordered a beer.

'Certainly, Sir, that'll be one cent.'

'One Cent?' the man exclaimed.

He glanced at the menu and asked:

'How much for a nice juicy steak

and a bottle of wine?'

'A nickel,' the barman replied.

'A nickel?' exclaimed the man.

'Where's the guy who owns this place?'

The bartender replied:

'Upstairs, with my wife.'

The man asked: 'What's he doing upstairs

with your wife?'

The bartender replied:

'The same thing I'm doing

to his business down here.'

 

The 6th & Best Affair

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside..

He looked up and said weakly:

'I have something I must confess.'

'There's no need to, 'his wife replied.

'No,' he insisted,

'I want to die in peace.

I slept with your sister, your best friend,

her best friend, and your mother!'

'I know,' she replied.

'Now just rest and let the poison work.'

Wow….. so furry

Wow… Wow… Wow…. So furry !!

What could this be ?????

Let zoom in the photo……..

yeah…. not what u thought what u saw just now right ? Smart camera man and doggy with very nice shape too.

On Boob

Now it makes sense !!

Cause of Mad Cow Disease

In a rural program for farmers, a female TV reporter seeking the main cause of Mad Cow disease, arranged for an interview with a farmer who may have some theories on the matter.

The interview was as follows:

The lady reporter: I am here to collect information on the possible sources of Mad Cow Disease. Can you offer any reason for this disease?
The farmer stared at the reporter and said…
Do you know that a bull mounts a cow only once a year?
Reporter (obviously embarrassed): Well, sir, that's a new piece of information but what's the relation between this phenomenon and Mad Cow disease?
Farmer: And, madam, do you know that we milk a cow twice a day?
Reporter: Sir, this is really valuable information, but what about getting to the point?
Farmer: I am getting to the point, madam. Just imagine, if I was playing with your tits twice a day.... and only screwing you once a year, wouldn't you get mad ?

THE TV INTERVIEW WAS NEVER AIRED...

$2 Hearing Aid

After months of gentle urging from his wife, a man finally had to admit he needed a hearing aid.

The audiologist confirmed it. "How much do they cost?" he asked her.

"As you might expect," she said, "There's quite a wide range. They run from $2.00 to $2,000."

"Wow, the low end is lower than I would have ever guessed!" he said. "Let's see the $2.00 model."

The woman gave a knowing nod, and pulled it out of the closest drawer.

"You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket," she said.

"How does it work?" the man asked.

"Oh now, come on! For $2.00 it doesn't work!" she said.

"I don't understand," the man said, but the woman had heard that before. "When people see it on you," she said, "they know to talk louder."

What Doing SHE !???

The 2 peoples on the photo totally caught my attention on yesterday noon time.

Let me tell you what I witness……..

She sat on the public bench… eyes closed… both hands holding to a card/photo… under noon hot sun… not moving, like meditated posture for a loooooong time.

He, the cameraman with all the gargets setup ready pointing to the stone alike lady & DO NOTHING… no snapping… no focusing… just stay cool next to the tripod and do nothing… 

I took the above 2nd photo after 5-8 mins…. she still there n he still there…. just as I am ready to walk over to slap her hard on her face than suddenly they pick up their stuffs and move on…. to where ? I don’t know but I don’t want to know too…..

But still…. I have no answer on what actually she did during that period of time….. too art lar….

DEMENTIA QUIZ:

FIRST QUESTION:
YOU ARE A PARTICIPANT IN A RACE. YOU OVERTAKE THE SECOND PERSON. WHAT POSITION ARE YOU IN?

~~~~~~~~~~  ~~~~~~~~~~



ANSWER : 

IF YOU ANSWERED THAT YOU ARE FIRST,
THEN YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY WRONG! IF YOU OVERTAKE THE SECOND PERSON AND YOU TAKE HIS PLACE, YOU ARE IN SECOND PLACE !
TRY TO DO BETTER NEXT TIME.
NOW ANSWER THE SECOND QUESTION,
BUT DON'T  TAKE AS MUCH TIME AS
YOU TOOK FOR THE FIRST QUESTION, OK?



SECOND QUESTION:
IF YOU OVERTAKE THE LAST PERSON, THEN YOU ARE....?
(SCROLL  DOWN)

~~~~~~~~~~  ~~~~~~~~~~





ANSWER:

IF YOU ANSWERED THAT YOU ARE SECOND TO LAST, THEN YOU ARE.....
WRONG AGAIN. TELL ME SUNSHINE, HOW CAN YOU OVERTAKE THE LAST PERSON??

YOU'RE  NOT VERY GOOD AT THIS, ARE YOU?

THIRD QUESTION:
VERY TRICKY ARITHMETIC! NOTE:
THIS MUST BE DONE IN YOUR HEAD ONLY.
DO NOT USE PAPER AND PENCIL OR A CALCULATOR. TRY IT.

TAKE 1000 AND ADD 40 TO IT. NOW ADD ANOTHER 1000 NOW ADD 30. ADD ANOTHER 1000. NOW ADD 20 . NOW ADD ANOTHER 1000.
NOW ADD 10. WHAT IS THE TOTAL ?

SCROLL DOWN FOR THE CORRECT ANSWER.....

 

~~~~~~~~~~  ~~~~~~~~~~



DID YOU GET 5000?

THE CORRECT ANSWER IS ACTUALLY 4100...

IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IT, CHECK IT WITH A CALCULATOR !
TODAY IS DEFINITELY NOT YOUR DAY, IS IT?

MAYBE YOU'LL GET THE LAST QUESTION RIGHT....  MAYBE...

FOURTH QUESTION :

MARY'S FATHER HAS FIVE DAUGHTERS:

1 NANA, 2. NENE, 3. NINI, 4. NONO, AND ???

WHAT IS THE NAME OF THE FIFTH DAUGHTER?

~~~~~~~~~~  ~~~~~~~~~~



DID YOU ANSWER NUNU? NO! OF COURSE IT ISN'T. HER NAME IS MARY ! READ THE QUESTION AGAIN !







OKAY, NOW THE BONUS ROUND,
I.E., A FINAL CHANCE TO REDEEM YOURSELF :



A MUTE PERSON GOES INTO A SHOP AND WANTS TO BUY A TOOTHBRUSH.
BY IMITATING THE ACTION OF BRUSHING HIS TEETH HE SUCCESSFULLY EXPRESSES HIMSELF TO THE SHOPKEEPER AND THE PURCHASE IS DONE.
NEXT, A BLIND MAN COMES INTO THE SHOP WHO WANTS TO BUY A PAIR OF SUNGLASSES; HOW DOES HE INDICATE WHAT HE WANTS?

~~~~~~~~~~  ~~~~~~~~~~




IT'S REALLY VERY SIMPLE. HE OPENS HIS MOUTH AND ASKS FOR IT....
DOES YOUR EMPLOYER ACTUALLY PAY YOU TO THINK??
IF SO DO NOT LET THEM SEE YOUR ANSWERS FOR THIS TEST!

Angry Birds Airway

 This is my favourite airline in the world !!!!!!

Still Google-ing for the homepage to book a ticket for my Xmas vacation…….. can’t find leh….. Sui…. help !! (Since you fwd me this very important piece of info !!!)

Pony Tail

Captured this from newspaper…. found it cute and funny but not sure what type of message Mr Weldon tried to share  

Romantic SMS

She sent the following message while waiting for her train:
My love
If you are sleeping, send me your dreams
If you are smiling, send me your smile
If you are crying, send me your tears
I love you

He replied:
I'm in the toilet. What do I send?

The true story, as told by Hillary .......

Finally, the true story as told by Hillary to world leaders...

Some years ago President Clinton was hosting a state dinner when, at the last minute, his regular cook fell ill, and they had to get a replacement on short notice. The fellow arrived and turned out to be a very grubby-looking man named Jon. The President voiced his concerns to his Chief of Staff but was told that this was the best they could do on such short notice. Just before the meal, the President noticed the cook sticking his finger in the soup to taste it and he again complained to the Chief Of Staff, but was told that this man was supposed to be a very good chef.

The meal went okay, but the President was sure that the soup tasted a little funny. By the time dessert came, he was starting to have stomach cramps and nausea. It was getting worse and worse until finally the President had to excuse himself from the dinner to look for the bathroom. Passing through the kitchen, he caught sight of the cook, Jon, scratching his rear end, which made him feel even worse.

By now, the President was desperately ill with violent cramps and was so disorientated that he couldn't remember which door led to the bathroom. He was on the verge of passing out from the pain when he finally found a door that opened. As he unzipped his trousers and ran in, he realized to his horror that he had stumbled into Monica Lewinsky's office with his trousers around his knees.

As he was just about to pass out, she bent over and heard the President whisper in a barely audible voice, "Sack my cook."

And that is how the whole misunderstanding occurred.....

Wendi Deng, Rupert Murdoch’s wife

Last few days, the world were busy on Rupert Murdoch news…. blah blah blah for days…. boring boring….

However, thing suddenly turn excited to me on Wed when both father and son was forced to sit down to face UK MP…. than oh….. nah…. this totally awesome video clip captured the real action of Mrs Murdoch when a good for nothing comedian tried to get media attention by attacking Wendi love hubby. Ladies…. see for yourself how to act like a real woman when your husband need your present !!!

Before this incident, I am not even know Rupert have a Asian wife (China lady oh !!!! DRAGON)

With this video clip out in the world, now the market value for Asian girls, especially Chinese sure shot sky high.

Again.. Steady lah, Wendi 姐姐。姐姐妹妹站起来 ！

Who's Your Role Model for 2011?

This is fun. I promise you WILL laugh when you find the identity of your role model.
NO CHEATING ! I was really surprised to find out the name of my role model. Don't scroll down yet...
To find the identity of your personal role model, do the math below...
Then scroll down to find your hero. It is crazy how accurate this is !

NO PEEKING !
1.) Pick your favourite number between 1 - 9
2.) Multiply by 3
3.) Add 3
4.) Then again multiply by 3... I'll wait if you need a calculator
5.) You'll get a 2 or 3 digit number
6.) Add the digits together

NOW SCROLL DOWN
And with that number, see who your ROLE MODEL is from the list below:

1. Einstein
2. Oprah Winfrey
3. Snoopy
4. Winston Churchill
5. Bill Gates
6. Gandhi
7. Barack Obama
8. Queen Elizabeth
9. Me La !!!

I know, I know.... I just have that effect on people.

P.S. Stop picking different numbers!! I AM YOUR Hero, JUST DEAL WITH IT !!

Photographic proof of Bin Laden's burial at sea..

It this consider good evident ?

Case Closed !!!

"i"

My son celebrated his 15th birthday, and I got him an.....

He just loved it. Who wouldn't?

My hubby celebrated his birthday in July, and I made him very happy when I bought him an.....

My daughter's birthday was in August, so I got her an

September came by my birthday, so for my birthday,

my hubby got me an

Mischievous Boys

Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, are excessively mischievous.

They are always getting into trouble and their parents know if any mischief occurs in their town, the two boys are  probably involved.

The boys' mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he  would speak with her boys. The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually.

The mother sent the 8 year old in the morning, with the  older boy to see the preacher in the afternoon. The  preacher, a huge man with a deep booming voice, sat the  younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Do you know where God is, son?"

The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open.
So the preacher repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God?! Again, the boy made no attempt to answer. The preacher raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed, "WHERE is GOD?!"

The boy screamed & bolted from the room, ran directly home & dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him. When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked, "What happened?"

The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time!" "GOD is missing, and they think WE did it!"